Crazy, Stupid, Love

Okay, a couple of months ago my wife, Amy, had a rare day off the following day, and our son was asleep by nine o' clock.  What to do???  Oh yeah you know what I'm talking about.  We decided to watch a movie.

So we have the overpriced On Demand through our cable company that we willing pay for from time to time.  We're going through the movie selections and checking different previews.  As you know this can take a lot of time to do if you are not careful.  It took us an hour to make a decision.  I wanted something of a more masculine variety.  I was thinking about that movie called The Eagle which is set twenty years after the Ninth Legion of the Roman army disappeared in the north of Britain.  A Roman centurion arrives in Britain to serve as a garrison commander, but also to salvage the honor of his family name as his father was in command of the Ninth Legion that disappeared along with the eagle standard.  Guys that sounds like a good movie, and it had my vote.  Unfortunately I still have not seen this movie.

My wife also had a vote, and for some reason I find that our votes are weighted.  She voted for Crazy, Stupid, Love, which is a romantic comedy (the genre that she almost always votes for).   And I've seen more romantic comedies than I wish to admit to.  This romantic comedy is about a middle-aged man who finds out that his wife slept with another man and wants a divorce. The story follows a year in the life of this couple along with their children, their babysitter, and an alpha-male super hunk that most women would rather spend the evening with than they would you or me gentlemen.

Now guys, what do I do in a situation like this?  Amy wants to watch a movie about a woman who wants to divorce her husband.  The husband wears New Balance shoes and gets his hair cut at Superclips (I wear New Balance and get my hair cut at Superclips), and has an alpha male character in it that is in much better shape than me, and let's face it, a lot better looking.  It sounds ominous. Should I be worried?   Fight or flight????  We watched Crazy, Stupid, Love.

You know what, I love that darn movie.  I watched the movie for the fourth time recently, one more time than Amy.  The night we watched it the first time, we enjoyed it so much that we watched it again, not getting to bed until three in the morning.  The time I did not watch it with Amy was on an airplane.  I was on my way to San Diego, and the attendant announced that there would be a free in-flight movie, and you could purchase headphones to hear that movie for, I think, two dollars.  Well I said to myself, "I'll be darned if I pay for headphones to watch a movie on an airplane.  Besides I have a good book to read and plenty of work to do.  One of the attendants came around with headphones, and I waved her off, maybe a bit too briskly.  The beginning of a movie came on with no sound on a screen I could not avoid.  It was Crazy, Stupid, Love.  Well I bowed my head, thought "I want to watch that movie," looked up for the attendant, held up my hand indicating that I would like to see her, and I requested headphones to watch that movie.  And I thoroughly enjoyed it once again.

I won't do anything to give away the movie, and I don't want to do an exhaustive review of the film.  All I will say is that Crazy, Stupid, Love is a movie that will make you laugh a lot. It may even bring a tear or two.  It is original.  And even though it is an embellishment of reality, I think the movie captures enough of reality for most people to identify.  In short Crazy, Stupid, Love is a pleasantly wonderful movie that we now own.  So guys if you have not seen it, on your next date night, suggest to your wife, significant other, girlfriend, boyfriend, date, or friend with benefits that you will make the sacrifice of watching this romantic comedy.  They will likely enjoy it as will you.  And guys if you are not in the floor laughing when the four men get into a fight, you lack the humor gene.

Toddler's say the darnedest things

My little boy, Augustus, is 2 years old.  He has always been a communicator, giving speeches and soliloquies that no one can understand.  But now, much of what you he says is becoming discernible, and it is a treat to watch his progression.  Or is it hear his progression, nonetheless, I've really enjoy it.

Augustus is a very polite child.  One day at Target, we were going through the checkout line.  The woman checking us out gave me no eye contact, was not thrilled to be working on this day, and was only going through the motions.  At the end of the transaction, she said, "Thank you," with little enthusiasm.  I responded with "Thank you."  Then you heard the soft, innocent voice of my son, "Tank yooouuuu!"  Everyone in line was charmed, and the most charmed person was the cashier.  She lit up.  She said, "Oh my, would you like a sticker."  She gave my boy a sticker, and he said, "Tank yoooouuuu!"  And then for good measure, "Tank yooouuuu," on the way out.  It was one of those great moments that make being a parent worth it.  Since then "thank you" is common to hear whenever someone gives him something.  I have no idea how he acquired the understanding of when to use the phrase, but I'll take credit.

His mother recently taught him to say, "Excuse me."  Actually it comes out "Stuze me."  He has picked up that when you burp, you say the phrase.  But now he is going around grunting (trying to formulate a burp), and then he says, "Stuze me."  He does this over and over again.  Grunt, "stuze me," grunt, "stuze me," grunt, "stuze me."  And if you burp, he also like to say, "Stuze me."  So this is commonplace as well.  For this my wife can take credit.

As many women know if married or just around men, the more masculine sex likes to quote lines from the movies they love.  I love the movie Lonesome Dove so you might hear me say, "It ain't dying I'm talkin' about, its livin'."  My friend, Clint, loves movies like Kingpin, so you might hear out of his mouth, "The name's not boy. It's Roy."  Another friend, Kyle, loves The Outlaw Josey Wales, and he might say, "Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie."  It is just something that guys do, and you guys know what I'm talking about.

Well Augustus has already started the process.  Right now he is watching Cars, and I heard him recite back something from the movie, "Mac....Mac....where are you Mac." He said it as clear as day, and this is happening a lot. He even imitated one of Lighting McQueen's sayings, "Ka-chow!" He has started to sing as well.  Whenever he watches Bolt, he sings the song that has a verse, "There is no home like the one you've got, cuz that home belongs to you."  He sings this verse, not perfectly, but he sings it.  He kind of rolls through it like someone singing a song that does not know the words, articulating some words and making sounds that might sound like a word that would work. So it comes out like, "ahhh oome like one ohh got, cuz one ongss to yoooouuuuu."  It is awesome, and he leans down, bowing his head when he sings, "yooouuuuu."  Then he claps for himself.  Brilliant.

My Wife and Fantasy Football

A marriage is only successful if the couple in question share a similar core value system.  My wife, Amy, and I are both politically moderate, we enjoy the same types of music and movies, we are both achievement oriented, we believe in the importance of education, and we love our little boy more than anything.  The problem is that she fails to share a core value that I have: fantasy football is awesome!  In fact my wife hates fantasy football.  It is quite possibly the only thing that we don't see "eye-to-eye" on.  Could this be a threat to our marriage?  I hope not, but before we go too much further, let's get into why the awesomeness of fantasy football is not only a value I share, but a value shared by America and thus should be valued by my wife.

American football is without a doubt the most popular sport in the United States and it is not close. That was not always the case.  Just twenty years ago football and baseball were virtually on par with each other in terms of popularity.  A shift took place around that time, and I believe that shift was fantasy football in conjunction with the fact that football shows better on television than does baseball.  I've heard that anywhere from 30 to 47 million people play fantasy football every year.
As a result, it is a phenomenon, dare I say an American value. 

So let's look at this logically.  It could be argued as the reason for the popularity of football.  It is played by 47 million people.  And it is an American value.  What is Amy's problem?  You might remember some of those logic exercises we did in school, like if Amy is a woman, and women are always right then Amy is always right.  Well let's put her to the test.  If fantasy football is an American value and my wife does not like fantasy football then she must be anti-American.  Isn't that the way it goes.  Let's try another.  If 47 million Americans think fantasy football is awesome, and my wife does not think it is awesome then she is apparently not a patriot.  Yeah, I think that is solid logic.  Socrates would be proud.  I am an American patriot and my wife is not because I think fantasy football is awesome and she does not. 

The question is, how can we get my wife to see the light and become more American ("Merican" if you like).  Maybe you know what I'm talking about.  Maybe you struggle with the same threat to your life-long partnership.  Check this out.  Amy rolls her eyes when I get online to check the drop/add list.  She looks at me with a blank look whenever I begin to tell her about the great trade I made.  She zones out when I suggest my acquisition of Aaron Rogers may result in a fantasy football title.  She fails to stop at Starbucks when we are traveling long distances on Sundays so I can get a wireless signal and check the progress of my team.  I don't understand.  She and I are not in alignment.  And she is something less than supportive when I throw things across the room or growl like a wounded animal when I discover I've lost to the "Teabaggers" or "DaBoys" by a point when my opponent's Quarterback throws a bomb for a touchdown in overtime on Monday night. Where's the empathy???  Does she need thearpy or a "re-education"program?

I really don't know the answer.  So I ask you ladies and gentlemen (most likely gentlemen), what can we do to help my wife...maybe your wife to understand how awesome our passion is?  Our marriages could be in dire straits if we cannot help our wives. Do we hire life coaches for them?  Do we use reverse psychology ("No sweet-heart, fantasy football is not at all important to me, how do you feel about it now)?  Something must be done.  Without a solution they may flee to Canada (because they are un-American) or some other dude. 

Toy Story Trilogy: The Greatest of All-time According to My Son

It seems that the Twilight trilogy is going to become a hexalogy (or double trilogy if you like or just too darn much if you don't).  This should please many young women across the world and cause consternation to many young men forced to watch the next three installments on date night.  I know I'm looking forward to it (tongue in cheek), and I'm not such a young man (but my wife will always be a young woman).  The excitement for Bella and Edward's marriage is palpable.  However my son Augustus says it is all "hogwash."  Actually he just turned two in September, so he actually said something like "Gee goo, maa, daa-eee."

Augustus believes that the creators of the Twilight series can make as many stories and movies as they like, it will never compare to the greatness that is the Toy Story trilogy.  Of course there have been great movie trilogies (or hexalogies): Star Wars, The Godfather, Rocky (looking forward to number six where Sly enters the MMA ring to face Brock Lesner after Lesner's character "Killer McGee" betrays their friendship by cancelling their fishing trip to hang out with the multi-talented Dolf Lundgren (Ivan Drago) in Aspen , Pirates of the Caribbean, Die Hard, Lethal Weapon, Shrek, and the list goes on and on.

Augustus makes a compelling case for his assertion.  Each of the three movies are original, rich in storyline, and just plain entertaining, no matter your age.  Augustus goes on to compare Toy Story to some of the others, or maybe he just wants more milk.  Not sure.

While many may say the Godfather trilogy is greatest ever, Augustus sees flaws that Toy Story does not have.  First of all, Godfather is very violent.  Augustus would rather watch stories (or as he says, "stor-eeeee") with limited violence that does not depict anyone being physically hurt.  Although in Toy Story 2 the Prospector bunches Woody in face and slices his arm with a pic ax.  So there is violence, but in the end everyone is okay.  Augustus also believes that Tom Hanks' Woody is superior to Al Pacino's Michael Corleone.  Corleone is a reluctant godfather wishing he could  leave the family business, having to make tough, ruthless decisions like having his brother eliminated, hiding much of what he does from his wife, and every time he thinks he has a way out, the family business pulls him back in.

While complex in character, Michael Corleone does not compare to Woody.  Woody is the leader of a village of toys that sets the mission for group.  Woody and everyone else is there for Andy, their owner.  When a usurper comes to challenge Woody's place in the hierarchy, he reacts selfishly only to later find that he is better than the selfish acts he committed.  As a result, he goes on to save the usurper (Buzz Lightyear) when he could have eliminated him (Michael Corleone would have let Sid launch Buzz on the rocket to explode in the Stratosphere).  Woody is also challenged by the possibility of being thrown away or sold in a garage sale. As a result he wrestles with finding another purpose in life, i.e. joining Prospector, Jesse, and Bulls-eye in a Tokyo toy exhibit.  He also suffers significant loss later in the trilogy, losing the love of his life, Bow-peep and his boy, Andy.   Corleone never faced challenges of this kind.

Augustus also believes the Rocky movies are overrated compared to Toy Story.  While the first Rocky won an academy award for best movie, my toddler believes that the first movie is the only one that is high in quality.  Rocky Balboa is a "down on his luck" character that gets a chance of a lifetime to fight for the heavy weight title.  Rocky proves up to the challenge even in loss.  Augustus loved the story line, but felt the subsequent movies try too hard to be bigger than the next.  As a result, each becomes either over sentimental or just over-the-top.  By Rocky V, Rocky is street fighting with his protege' while a Don King like character makes overly emotional facial contortions in a mink coat on the sidewalk . It proved to be a poor effort to what was a great first movie.

There was no drop off in quality in the Toy Story series.  In fact it could be argued that each Toy Story movie was better than the previous one.  Augustus believes that Buzz Lightyear (performed by the acting genius, Tim Allen) is one of the better hero characters of all-time.  Buzz works to save Woody from an individual that steals him from Andy and seeks to make a fortune on his sale to a Japanese investor.  When Woody loses himself in what might negatively happen as Andy gets older, Buzz brings him back to purpose, which is to be Andy's favorite toy.  Always a voice of reason, Buzz is a brilliant ying to Woody's yang.  Plus Buzz has cool gadgets, can speak Spanish, could perform on Dancing with the Stars with his moves as a Latin dancer, and falls with style.  Rocky never had the footwork of Buzz and is limited in that his only attributes are a great left hook and an iron jaw.

Now for the Twilight series.  Twilight has vampires and werewolves interacting with humans in a high school setting.  It seems that the alpha males from each species are extremely attracted to Bella, a skinny 16 year old girl who just moved in with her father after her mother decided to go on the road with her minor league baseball player fiancee'.  In the end (or is it just the beginning) the vampire alpha male, Edward, wins Bella's heart, and impregnates her with a vampire baby that is draining her life force.  The werewolf alpha male, Jacob, takes on the classic "best friend" role and watches as the love of his life falls for another.  Jacob sits by, emotionally hurt, but understanding.  Augustus said that Jacob was a wimp, and that if he were a werewolf he would fight the vampire to the death for the love of his life.  Actually I think he said he just wanted his pacifier.  Nonetheless Twilight stretches one's willingness to suspend disbelief, whereas toys communicating and going on adventures is very believable to Augustus.

Augustus can go on and on about the superiority of the Toy Story trilogy to other so-called great movie trilogies or series.  But he is sleepy and says it is nap time.   But he leaves us with this, watch all three Toy Story movies and see if they are not three of the best movies you've ever seen.  He bets that you will find it to be the case.  And please don't come back with any stale arguments about the stellar acting of Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow even coming close to performances of even Toy Story's secondary characters like Don Rickles as Mr. Potatohead, Joan Cusack as Jesse, or the incomparable John Ratzenberger (Cliff Clavin from Cheers) as Hamm.

My Son's Potty Mouth

I must say the shame of my ability as a parent begins.  I was sitting with a cup of coffee at my side this morning, and my son, Augustus, climbed in my lap to play.  We got to wrestling a bit, and his arm flared out and tipped the coffee cup.  There the cup stood teetering back and forth on the edge of the arm of the sofa on which we were sitting.  At that point, I responded to the potential disaster that would be the spilling of a cup of coffee on our new sofa or the possible breaking of my wife's Longaberger cup.  My response was shameful.  I said "Oh ...," Well you know what I said.

My son turned two years old a month ago, and he is at that phase when he repeats everything that seems interesting to say.  He has also been very good with his "S" words for some time now.  Some of his favorite words to say are, "stuck," "step," "story," and "SH" words like, "show," "shush," and "ship."  This morning he added a new "SH" word to his repertoire.  Now I generally love it when a new word enters his vocabulary, but obviously this time was not one of those times.

As I mentioned before, I cursed in response to the my coffee cup's potential tumbling onto our sofa and/or floor this morning.  Luckily I was able to catch the cup before it did.  But the word did come out of my mouth.  Right after the point of catching the cup, I breathed a sigh of relief and looked at Augustus.  There he sat on my lap looking at his daddy with a quizzical yet enthusiastic expression, and he said slowly and clearly, "shhhhh----iiii---."  "Oh no," I thought.  Here it really begins.

My son is like a sponge and fully conscious of everything that goes on, especially the actions and words of his daddy.  I must learn to watch what I say.  I guess it is time to begin thinking about alternatives for those words that I might say in frustration, pain, or responses to trouble.  Anyone have suggestions.  Obviously "fudge," "shucks," and "mother of pearl." are possibilities.  I think there might be more interesting words to include.  Unfortunately I am expressive so holding my tongue is probably not going to happen.  Well feel free to respond to my query.

Halloween Candy

Halloween is one of those times every year that are great for kids, but for we adults that lack self control (particularly me) it is a blessing and a curse.  In preparing for the day, both my wife and I came in with a couple of bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters without knowing the other was buying candy.  Now we have twice the candy that we felt necessary.  What we could do is double up on the amount of candy we will give out on the 31st, but do you think we will do that.  No we're already doing what I feared.  We're eating the candy, which tastes pretty good (blessing).  Yesterday, I had a couple of packs of M&M's, two Baby Ruth's, a Snickers, and I split a Kit Kat with my son.  I don't even want to tell you what I included in my breakfast this morning.  It is shameful my lack of self control when I have sweets around (curse).

An extra five pounds to my already over-weight body seems to be the destiny for me for the few days that surround Halloween.  But I bet my son has a blast.  We don't know if we'll take him trick-or-treating or just have him hand out candy.  I think he might like handing out candy best this year, so I am leaning that way.

Introducing Dr. Dave

Hello everyone and welcome to Dr. Dave's Average Mind.  First let me introduce myself.  My name is David Gibson and I have a doctorate that serves me well in the leadership and organizational development fields.  However do not expect this to be leadership blog.  This is a blog about me.  It is an expressive outlet for an educated guy with average mental abilities (maybe slightly above average on a good day).  It is not my ultimate goal to have this blog read by anyone, but it would be cool to have a bit of a following.  It is an outlet for someone that spends a lot of time with a two year old and gets only mild adult conversation.  My two year old son, my wife, my wife's career, my career struggles, our new life in Madison, Wisconsin, my love of sports, old memories that may or may not be interesting, new experiences with the same parameters, my political views (only so much however), and whatever comes to mind at any given time will be the basis of this blog.